Here Comes Santa Claus...?

We decided early in our careers as parents that we would not be partaking in the tradition of Santa. This was an easy thing for Matt...he never grew up with Santa. I, however, did grow up with Santa and looked forward to doing this with my own children. I argued with Matt for a long time...like a year or more...all the while taking my sweet baby Sierra to sit on the big guy's lap to get her picture taken. Matt would grudgingly follow behind. He would grumble under his breath his objections to this ritual and I would get frustrated at him taking the magical air out of my balloon.

But then, the unthinkable happened. I came to understand and AGREE (this doesn't happen often....lol) with my husband. He had good points for not wanting to do the Santa thing:

1) he never grew up with it (or any other fantastical creation like the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy). Ok...this was his weakest argument.

2) He believed in keeping the focus of the holiday where it should be...in a miracle birth of a savior. He did not like how kids focused so much on a fictional hero where there is a real hero that gave the greatest gift EVER to us. It rubbed him the wrong way.

3) He does not believe in lying to his kids...and yes, he believed this to be a lie. He wants his kids to trust in him and me fully...no doubts. He felt very strongly about this...even to the point of saying if I were to pursue the Santa thing and one of his kids were to come to him and ask him if Santa were real, he would have no choice but to be honest with them. This point made me a bit mad....at first. I came to see the wisdom in this, though.

4) He works hard.....really hard. He HATES the thought of some fictional character taking credit for what he worked hard to give to his kids. He wants his kids to know that we lovingly picked out their gifts...there is HEART and SOUL behind each gift and a REAL LIVE person to hug and THANK.

His arguments became harder and harder to argue. I soon saw the wisdom in it and agreed we would go his way.....and I have NEVER regretted it. Sierra, honestly, never had ANY interest at ALL in Santa. It was quite strange...people would ask what Santa would bring her for Christmas and she would look at them like they were psycho. lol Daniel, on the other hand, has had more of an issue grasping the concept. In years past...no biggie. This year, it is all about Santa. He has written a couple letters to Santa (one he put in a bottle on the lawn) and once saw Santa at a restaurant and before we knew it was on his lap. We laugh and explain...if he wants something he needs to let us know.

Now, we are not crumudgeons about it. They watch all the Santa movies...just as Mickey Mouse is a cute cartoon figure and Iron Man is an exciting action hero...Santa is just a fun thing to watch. We love Rudolph and Frosty and Prep and Landing. They are fun.

Probably our biggest obstacles are other parents. It is funny how we have taught our kids to be respectful to other families who choose to do the Santa thing...absolutely do NOT tell other kids that Santa is not real. But, when other parents find out that our kids do not believe, WHOA. I often feel like we are abusing our children by this choice. We are squashing their imaginative spirit...course these adults are never around my children and do not see how deep and wide their imagination caverns spread. I have never met a kid with a bigger imagination than my son...and Sierra, now 11 1/2 going on 16, might not have the imagination she ONCE had....her imagination was CRAZY even a year or so ago.

It often feels like so many people need to justify their choice to do Santa...as though I am judging them for their choice. It simply is not true. It is a personal choice we made and we hold no ill will to those who went the other way. Santa is a fun tradition. I have many memories of laying awake in bed listening for reindeer or boots. I never heard them, but I always awoke to some treasure (my favorite, a baby doll with a dress and a matching stroller). I remember the feeling of anticipation. I also remember finding out the truth (admittedly a cruel admission) and feeling crushed. BUT, that in no way made my decision. I listened to my husband and followed my heart.

Funny thing about Sierra being older, is I can get her perspective on this. She has told me how much she appreciates the fact that we did not do Santa. She says that she knows just how deep our honesty is (not that I am claiming perfection 100% of the time...but it is our goal to be as honest as possible). She says she knows that each present is a present that we, her parents, picked out for her. I do not even have my kids write lists. I listen to them. I hear them say things like "I wish I could have...." or "I want ... so bad". I catalog these items and than try my hardest to provide these to them. I do not need them to list things out...

But, for the parents who have the Santa tradition, please know that I do not judge you for your choices. I do not see anything wrong with letting your kids believe. IT was just not for us. We love Christmas very much and spend many man hours making it special for our kids and each other. We simply cut out one small part of it. I have no regrets in following Matt's lead on this. Sierra is a good example of why this works...for us. If my kids are well-rounded and happy, than everyone else can take a big breath and move on.